super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
what day is it and did you see me today?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
