So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
