You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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