My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
