Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
