did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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