I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
