She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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