So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
No subtext here. People are naked.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
