After last night, I could never be a politician.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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