I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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