Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Randomize
