Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
We smell like vodka and hangover
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
