Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
