Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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