Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
