"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Randomize
