moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Randomize
