That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
