She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize