We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Randomize
