Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
