I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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