if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
