i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
