i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
