Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
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