I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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