Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
not ubering you a puppy
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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