ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
