Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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