I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Actions speak louder than pants.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
