He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
