Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize