The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
