I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
