how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
