great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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