I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
