We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
