his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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