Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
