It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
She's the barista slut.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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