Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
