She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
The uberlube is also flammable
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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