And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize