2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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