I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize