Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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