Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
