Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
