The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
